OTAKON

IS ALMOST HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is what I will be cosplaying:

It will be the White suit with the red mushroom!

My friend Stephanie will be cosplaying this:

But it will be her alternate outfit from Marvel vs. Capcom!

I can't wait!

Otakon!

Otakon is literally 2 weeks away and in a couple of hours, I will get the bus tickets, Greyhound have them for $20 round trip, good damn price I say! I will take my broken ass camera and try to take some pics with it, I will also bring my BJD for the meets that are happening there as well as the panel, hopefully I can get him a new wig too, I hate the one he wears now. I don't know why I am still awake, my ass needs to be sleep.

Wonder if I am still public enemy number 1? I sweated out my hair do and I have a job interview tomorrow! WHEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I got my hair done today, felt real good to be back in a salon chair again. If I knew how to put pics up on this blog, I would throw some up lol. Tuesday I have a job interview, it's with a temp agency but I cannot wait for HEAP and I need a job NOW. AGAIN I am going to Otakon broke, just enough to eat, I can't buy anything...well maybe let's see how much I can save, I still need to buy the bus tickets. I am playing catch up with bills, con-ed and rent gets paid next week and I should be able to purchase the 2 tickets for me and my friend. Let's see how all this goes cause if not I will be cashing in my coins!

Geez

Well I must be that much of a bad person that people keep slipping away from me....
As much as I helped out with problems and educated them on the things they didn't know and just flat out being there for them, I feel as if I am being treated like pure 100% shit. I feel as if I should be accepted for who I am but there are points that were made that I am changing and that's a good thing I think. But nothing is going to stop that feeling I have right now. I don't have many friends, I have lots of associates that don't give a shit about me and personally I don't really care too much about them. I only care about 3 but only I think 1 still care about me, sucks...but eh...

Soo I went to the gym today

o.o is all I say to that...I already hurt.

My life change

So I was out with my mom for the past 2 days and she kept looking at my ribbon, finally she asked me what it was for and I let her know that there were a few things that I need to change about myself, her exact words were, and I quote, "Why are you changing things about yourself, you are fine the way you are" I told her about the things I want to change and that it was causing me friends and she said again....and I quote "Well if they were your real friends, they wouldn't care how you were, fuck them" My mom can be a bit...harsh...but I don't want to be like her at all, her attitude is not that great either and she realizes it sometimes herself. I just need more positive people in my life because what I put out is what I learned...

All my life it was all about black power and black this and black that...and we got to stand up for ourselves and so on and so forth...and whites aint shit and white trash and racisim...this comes mostly from my mom and my aunt...but how do you stop racisim when your racist against another race? It don't make sense to me. I understand racism happened many many years ago and it still happens today, hell there are still slaves in Africa.

I just need to get away from all of the negativity because I am trying to change...not get worse. Maybe I will start doing something during the days since I am not working...I guess go to the gym...work out my frustrations, get my stomach flat finally...cause this little buldge isn't cute!

Ja Ne!